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| Photo by Andrew Hockridge |
Location: Etobicoke
BurgerTours Rating: 4.85
| Taste | Messiness | Price | Venue | Pluses |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Good | Very Messy | $6-$10 | Fast Food | Veggie |
Drew's Review
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| Photo by Andrew Hockridge |
Mark and I were travelling to the west end one day and decided to give this joint a try. We entered the restaurant and it was like we travelled back in time. The interior is decorated with Marilyn Monroe posters and red bar stools; it resembles an old 50's diner. But that was the only thing that caught my attention. I give it an 8/10 on the interior appearance. The exterior, however, wasn't eye-appealing at all - a brick-layered building with the 'Apache' lettering lit up in red. And for a business that's far from the suburban life of Toronto, it really gives you an idea of what to expect when you get that far away.
We walk over to the register to glance at the menu. As I was looking for something to wake up my taste buds, I was a little disappointed that I didn't see any real signatures, other than their own custom 'Apache' burger, with the option of bacon for a dollar more. "Well," I thought, "where else am I going to have an Apache burger?" So I decided that was going to be my choice. I read my order to the person on cash, and at this point, he says they only accept cash and points me to the ATM right around the corner. That's when I thought, "well, where was the effing sign?"
I quickly take out a 20 and hand it to the cashier to receive my change. We haven't even received our burgers and I was already irritated with this place. Now for some reason, even though Mark and I were the only ones who had placed our orders with a five minute gap between the person before us, the process of making the burgers was quite slow. Not to mention, there were only two workers at this time.
It was about 10 minutes before we received our meals, only to realize Mark and I, for the first time, ordered the same combo with the only difference being our drinks. So this is where you’ll be able to tell the difference(s) between my taste buds and his. We grab a table and quickly take our seats. I unwrap the foil off of the burger and I literally said to myself, "the fuck is this mess?"
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| The Apache Burger/Photo By Andrew Hockridge |
You can tell from the picture I took in the photo to the right that the top bun was in pretty rough shape - like it was beaten with a spatula over and over again. And even though I asked for all the additional toppings on it, I was kind of regretting my decision because it made the burger a whole lot messier than if I didn't get any toppings. Plus, the burger didn't really look that appetizing to begin with. I was almost hesitant into taking it back. But after all, this is #BurgerTours and it is my job to critique the burger in every way shape or form. So if Apache Burgers wanted a bad review, they sure as hell are getting one.
The taste of the burger is the kind of taste you get when your burger comes right off the grill, even though it probably still had a few minutes left to cook. The meat was a little dry and tasted a bit undercooked. As I said earlier, there wasn't much to the bun. In fact, the top bun nearly crumbled apart completely before completing. I decided to add all the fixings because if I wanted an Apache Burger done right, I had to order it fully loaded. And to my finding, the toppings, which included ketchup, mustard, pickles, tomatoes, onions, and relish, didn't add much value to the overall taste of the burger. To me it was just another ordinary burger with a lot of additional toppings - nothing special about it.
When Mark and I started doing #BurgerTours, one of our goals was to separate the good places from the bad; the signatures from the traditional; the quality from the quantity etc. And maybe it's just me but I feel my favourite GTA burger at this point needs to be matched, and if the next burger joint doesn't live up to my standards, they will get a negative review. That's not to say I'm being picky but if you know how to tickle my funny bone, it will be a lot easier for me to write a good review for your business.
3.2/10
Mark's Review
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| Apache Burger w/ Bacon/Photo by Mark Avila |
I feel like our burger tours in the west end have all been spontaneous decisions.
Another long trip to Sherway Gardens in Mississauga got us craving for burgers, so I immediately thought of Apache Burger. We were thinking of tagging this joint sometime down the road, but since we were in the area it was a good opportunity check this place out. I’ve read about Apache online before and saw some mixed reviews, so I thought I’d come in person and experience it for myself. Steps away from Kipling station, Apache Burger is a small and quiet joint that takes on the appearance of a seventies diner.
There were very few burger options to choose from so Andrew and I coincidentally chose the Apache Burger with bacon. It’s your typical bacon cheeseburger with your choice of additional toppings. I topped mine off with lettuce, tomato, pickles, ketchup, and mustard. It started off as a small burger, but when you add the toppings it was a challenge to take the first bite. First impressions... it was simple. The burger bun was very dry, and the patty was bland and lacking flavour. The toppings gave it some flavour, but not enough to satisfy my taste buds.
Overall, I was quite disappointed with the food and service. Not very engaging and felt like they were speeding the service to get the customers in and out as fast as possible. Would I ever come back to this place? Yes, but not anytime soon.
6.5/10
